


Burger Day

by SaraJaye



Category: Bob's Burgers (Cartoon)
Genre: Gen, Holidays, Humor, Patriotism, family arguments, vacation planning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-24
Updated: 2016-06-24
Packaged: 2018-07-18 01:42:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7294453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SaraJaye/pseuds/SaraJaye
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's a lot of different ways to love your country. Too bad the Belchers can't agree on one.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Burger Day

"Bobby, we _gotta_ close the restaurant down! It's Fourth of July weekend, we should go to the beach or something!"

"Lin, for the last time, no." Bob gave the counter one last swipe. "We're coming into like, major burger season here. It's a proven fact that people eat more burgers during the summer, especially on the most patriotic day of the year, and with every other place closed we'll do more business! We'll be the only place to eat!"

"Except not really, cause everyone's gone to the beach," Louise grumbled. "Just watch, we keep the place open and Teddy's our only customer."

"I'll buy a burger! Except I'll have to pay you in gum wrappers," Gene piped up.

"I want to go to the beach," Tina muttered. "There's guys there, and their butts."

"We're opening the restaurant," Bob said. "It's un-American not to serve hamburgers on a day like today! Our forefathers died so we could-"

"So we could be stuck behind a counter all weekend serving one person?" Linda snorted. "Bobby, we're closin' down and we're going to the beach! C'mon, we can get all the hamburgers we want from the concession stand, or we can have our own little barbecue. Oooh, barbecue, let's do that!"

"Concession stands are unforgivingly expensive," Gene said with a nod. "Our forefathers didn't die so we'd have to pay ten bucks for a hot dog or fifteen for ice cream!" Bob sighed, hitting his head on the freshly-cleaned counter as his family babbled on and on. Linda wanted a beach barbecue, Tina wanted to stare at boys, Louise wanted to make money off of suckers, Gene wanted to write a patriotic song and Bob...

Bob just wished for once they could all be in agreement about something.

_Is this how the founding fathers felt when they made up the Declaration of Independence?_ And why did it even matter? Much as Bob loved his country, he didn't love it enough to shut down his business for an entire day. It was bad enough he was legally bound to close on Christmas and other major holidays (and why should he close on Christmas, anyway? What about the Jewish people who didn't like Chinese food, they should have another option).

On the other hand, he did like fireworks. And this was one of the only times of the year to see them.

"How about if we're open till one? Then..." Bob sighed. "Then we can go to the beach."

"Noon," Linda said.

"Twelve-thirty."

"Twelve-fifteen."

It took them fifteen whole minutes to decide on twelve-thirty.

"All right! Let's get ready to love America!" Linda cheered as she started to pack her bag. The kids started arguing over what to put in the picnic basket, and Bob retreated to the solitude of the kitchen.

_At least I'll get to see fireworks today._


End file.
